Marriage is more than a legal document or a ceremony; it is a complicated institution that is shaped by changing societal norms, emerging cultural values, and personal choice. Whether we are debating names and vows that are steeped in tradition because they have been passed down from generation to generation, or traditions like same-sex marriage that continue to evolve our concept of what marriage entails, there’s no doubt marriage continues to be redefined across the globe.

This blog will explore various aspects of marriage: what marriage is, how we think about marriage differently depending on legal systems, biblical or social meanings of relationships, and even pop culture representations of relationships (e.g., Young Sheldon’s Georgie and Mandy) that alter our understanding of romantic relationships, love, and commitment. From “what is lavender marriage?”, to “when was gay marriage legalized?”, this blog aims to contextualize and explore what people are asking today about marriage.

Let’s unravel the stories, laws, and ideas that have shaped the marriage topic as we know it today, and why it remains such a controversial subject.

Historic Context

In some ancient civilizations (Mesopotamia, Greece, and others), marriage was primarily a political aspect for land transfer, governance, or to enforce peace between tribes or kingdoms. The idea of using romantic love as the basis for marriage did not gain traction until the late 18th century in the Western world.

In contrast, marriage (vivaha) in ancient India (Hinduism) has always been depicted as a sacred samskara, a rite of passage that was primarily spiritual rather than simply a social contract. Marriage was not a union between two humans only, but rather a sacred link between two souls meant to last for seven lifetimes (saptapadi). Marriage represented a means to fulfill the ends of dharma (duty), artha (prosperity), and kama (desire) and ultimately lead toward moksha (liberation).

What Is a Lavender Marriage?

A lavender marriage is a marriage between a man and a woman, where one or both of the individuals are homosexual, but the marriage is arranged to hide their sexual orientation in order to conform to external and socially constructed pressures.

Origin of the Term

A term that originated in the early 20th century. During Hollywood’s Golden Age, several actors engaged in lavender marriages that protected their careers from scandal. On the surface, they were heterosexual couples; behind the scenes, their romantic lives were a different matter.

These marriages sometimes offered safety and convenience in a climate where being openly gay could result in imprisonment, losing a job, or even death. And while lavender marriages are not as common as they used to be, similar arrangements still exist in conservative cultures or communities.

What Is Common Law Marriage?

Common law marriage is a type of informal marriage that can be recognized in some jurisdictions without undergoing a ceremony or formal license. To be valid, most jurisdictions require the couple to meet certain conditions (which may vary from state to state) including:

• Living together for a long period of time
• Having the mutual intent to be married
• Showing everyone publicly that they are married

Where is it legal?

Only a handful of states in the U.S. still recognize common law marriage including:

• Texas
• Colorado
• Iowa
• Kansas
• Montana

Even if it is not formally recognized by states, in some cases courts may apply recognition in very limited legal issues like inheritance or a couple’s insurance policy.

When was gay Marriage legalized?

For United States, On June 26, 2015, the U.S. Supreme Court struck down state bans on same-sex marriage in Obergefell v. Hodges, making it legal in all 50 states.

Prior to this ruling, gay marriage had been legalized somewhat conditionally and sporadically in some states, including Massachusetts, where it became legal for gay couples in 2004. By 2015, gay marriage had become legal in 37 states before federal law caught up.

Globally

• Canada: 2005
• South Africa: 2006
• Argentina: 2010
• Ireland: 2015 (where they voted nationally!)
• Taiwan: 2019
• UK: phased in country-by-country starting in 2013 and finishing in 2020.

Some countries still only have a civil union option, and others have no legal standing at all for same sex couples.

What Does the Bible Say About Marriage?

In Christianity, marriage is viewed as a divine covenant. It’s mentioned as early as Genesis and described as a sacred, monogamous union.

Key Verses

• Genesis 2:24: “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife…”
• Ephesians 5:25: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church.”

But opinions differ across denominations. For instance, some more traditional interpretations reject same-sex marriages and reinforce traditional gender roles, but others such as the Episcopal Church and the United Church of Christ valorize more inclusive interpretations.

Is sex before marriage a sin?

This has always been, and remains an extremely contentious issue within religious and secular contexts. Many religious traditions — including Christianity, Islam, and certain sects of Hinduism — view sex before marriage as a sin, or at best, a moral misstep.

Modern Viewpoint

However, times have changed. Survey data in many international contexts, particularly urban or Western cultures, suggest that sex before marriage is now viewed largely as a matter of personal choice, rather than a sin or moral shortcoming. Ultimately, people’s beliefs around this aspect of relationships are generally influenced by their culture, upbringing, and sense of values.

What Is a Good Marriage?

There is no single form of a successful marriage, but most successful marriages have some common characteristics:

• Trust and Honesty: They can communicate openly, respecting each other.
• Emotional Support: They feel safe with one another.
• Flexibility: They can both adapt to life’s changes and stressors.
• Shared Vision: They have aligned family, career, and lifestyle goals.

Marriage Therapy

Marriage therapy or relationship therapy can also build or rebuild marriages. While there can be stigma attached to marriage counseling in particular, it isn’t just for couples in crisis. It can be a proactive opportunity to strengthen their connections.

What Percent of Marriages End in Divorce?

Contrary to the common myth, not every marriage ends in divorce; and the often repeated figure of 50% is outdated.

In the U.S.:

• First marriages: ~40 to 45% end in divorce
• Second marriages: ~60%.
• Third marriages: ~73%.

Younger generations are more conservative with marriage. Many date, live together, get to know one another before marrying, and are waiting longer to get married. All of these contribute factors to lessen divorce risk.

Are Marriage Records Public Records?

Yes, marriage records are generally considered public records in most jurisdictions and can be found by searching:

• Government registries
• County clerk offices
• Online databases

There may be limitations on obtaining access for recent marriages or some records are subject to privacy exemptions and restrictions

How To Get a Marriage License?

The process to get a marriage license can vary from country to country, and from region to region, but take these steps as guidance:

• File your application with the appropriate local area (i.e. county clerk).
• Provide identification (i.e. passport, driver’s license, etc.)
• Pay a fee (typically $30 to $100).
• Obtain any waiting period (not all counties require).

Where to Get a Marriage License?

In the U.S., it is usually the county clerk’s office. Some states allow you to apply for your license online and some counties will allow you to obtain your marriage license for other counties than the county where the marriage ceremony takes place.

Changing Your Name for Marriage

Changing your name after marriage is not an automatic process; it involves paperwork and a bit of admin work:

• Get several certified copies of your marriage certificate.
• Notify the Social Security Administration (U.S.).
• Update driver’s license, passport, bank accounts, and other records

You are under no obligation to change your name after marriage. Changing your name is completely optional and many couples now utilize options like hyphenating or creating a new family name.

Is Gay Marriage Legal in All 50 U.S. States?

Yes, as of the 2015 Supreme Court decision, Obergefell v. Hodges, gay marriage is legal in all 50 U.S. states. However, gay marriage is still a politically and socially controversial issue, that is still being reviewed by conservatives.

Other places where it is currently illegal or with partial recognition include:

• Japan: Not recognized at the national level, but some cities provide partnership certificates.
• Italy: Civil unions only.
• Saudi Arabia, Nigeria, Russia: No recognition, and in some cases criminalized.

What Is a Covenant Marriage?

A covenant marriage is a legal commitment designed to limit divorce rates by making it harder to get out of the marriage. Typically, a covenant marriage requires:

• Premarital counseling
• Limited grounds for divorce (e.g. abuse, felony, adultery)

Currently, only Louisiana, Arizona, and Arkansas have covenant marriages.

Interesting Facts About Marriage

• Longest recorded marriage: Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher (86 years!)
• Most expensive wedding: Vanisha Mittal and Amit Bhatia ($60+ million)
• Most countries with the lowest divorce rates: India, Chile, Colombia
• Most countries with the highest divorce rate: Luxembourg, Spain, Belgium

Pop Culture Reference: Georgie and Mandy’s First Marriage

Now, let’s get on to the burning question.

Where to Watch Georgie and Mandy’s First Marriage?

The couple, Georgie and Mandy from Young Sheldon, officially married in Season 7, Episode 14, titled “A New Home and a Traditional Texas Torture.” Their relationship has melted hearts by showcasing their sweet awkwardness, young parenthood, and southern charm!

You can watch it on:

• Paramount+
• CBS All Access
• Amazon Prime Video
• YouTube TV
• Apple TV (purchase option)

Availability might vary by country, so double-check with your local streaming service.

Marriage Story (Film)

The 2019 film “Marriage Story” is not just a movie, but an emotionally true reflection of many couples. It was directed by Noah Baumbach and follows the breakdown of a marriage between a couple called Charlie (Adam Driver) and Nicole (Scarlett Johansson).

The authenticity of “Marriage Story” makes the film powerful, which culminates in the observation that love does not always equal a successful marriage. Sometimes, brothers and sisters, communication fails, priorities change, and emotions explode.

A Good Marriage (Stephen King)

If you are a fan of psychological thrillers then “A Good Marriage” is also a novella and later a film by Stephen King. The story features what appears to be the “perfect marriage” until a dark secret is revealed (that is clearly something far less than perfect). It serves a reminder that appearances can be deceiving!

Conclusion

Marriage can be seen as a tapestry made of threads of tradition, free will, love, and the law. Whether we are talking about a common-law couple in Colorado, a couple of same-sex partners in Ireland, or two fictional sitcom characters like Georgie and Mandy, marriages illustrate unique stories, be they romantic, political, spiritual, or practical—all human stories.

Whether you are contemplating the notion of marriage, preparing for one, or just binging Young Sheldon, the concept of marriage or the definition of marriage is evolving, and that’s what makes it interesting.

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